yksin tai kaksin, porukas ja kaverin kaa.. always the same. guys, you can´t never run away from them, they are going to stick on this fuckin earth for ever! and that is the single thing that is making me crazy. there was this one night, when i desided to go for a walk. I starded to here some steps behind me, relly quick steps. i heard my mind saying to me "run..run..run!!!" im not even sure why because, those where the steps of some stupid jogger. Still i couldn´t help it, my legs did not listen to me. I was so drained but i had to move on.. Eventually he, yes you hearded right, HE passed me. after a long turn i stopped and took a breath when it hit me, the same guy where passing me, again. I starded running, i was so exhausted but i keps going. i passed him, he passed me, then was my turn and so on. finally i took the last push, i turned and smiled at him. It didn´t last long when i already starded hearing him talking. And little bit later i found myself drying my hair and runnig, again, from my flat closing the door behind me. I had a date. a real date, without alcohol, without complications. just me and him and Helsinki. I had blast. I think i had too much blast. see, that´s the problem. i convince my self that, yea, thats the guy, he´s fine, im into him because he is probably into me, yea just coool. Couple hours go, and im like nhaaaah.. not liken him. that is the fuckin prblem- i always try to like the right boys and i always believe that he is the one. but why? because i know, in the deep in, i know that i will only hurt him and disappoint myself. When i will relly realize that im just not that type off girl who is in a wonderful and loveable relationship. nonono. I im that kind off girl who likes to be hurted and likes to shuffer when the love off shes life is NOT interested off you -when he is NOT drinking offcourse- he loves me in the bar, and makes love with me in the night, and kiss me on the neck in the morning and says incredible thing to you --- the most inportant, makes you laugh everytime when you are near him. rest off the time-- he don´t call you, he don´t answer to my calls, he don´t talk about me..-and the worst he doesn´t relly give a shit.welcome to my life, enjoy the ride! my number one project in this point relly is the forgetting. forgetting all my feeling, towards anyone. Im single, im independent, and hell yea im proud. Nobody is ever, ever going to step on my toes, never again. well at least im trying to create this new image? working, ait? like you never wanted to hear from me, xx